Shave #1: Hope Floats

Let's cut to the chase (see what I did there?): the cheap disposable razor made short work of my weekend beard.  It didn't feel as smooth as a Mach3 cartridge, but the first shave on a new blade always feels weird to me.  Usually the second or third shave seems smoother.  Time will tell, I suppose.

Since I rarely use them, I had forgotten another key quality of disposable razors.  They float.  On the rare occasions that I do use disposables, I find the floating a little disturbing because of a superstition I have about shaving.  It comes from the movie "Miller's Crossing,"during a scene in which the bad guys are staking out a man they plan to shoot.  As they argue about proper shaving technique, the head bad guy, played by Jon Polito, explains that you should fill the basin with cold water and let your razor sit in it.  Cold water causes the steel in the razor blade to contract, thus presumably bestowing a sharper blade on the shaver.

I can't attest to the scientific proof of that assertion, but I do it anyway.

Cartridge-headed razors like the Mach3 usually feature metal handles that cause them to sink to the bottom of the basin.  Not so plastic disposables.  I shouldn't complain.  After all, the use of plastic brings the price down to less than $2 per razor at retail.  However, it feels cheap.

As consumers, we have a torrid love-hate relationship with plastic.  We love the economy and performance afforded by plastic, yet we hate the material itself.  In addition to cheap razors and other consumer products, we like bottles that don't shatter when you drop them, outdoor furniture that can't rust and bright, non-fading colors on things like magic markers and most of the housewares in Target.  However, we always have teetering landfills in the back of our minds when we think about plastic as a material.

I think our ambivalence towards plastic has another edge to it: mortality.  Plastic is immortal, but it comes from the same basic substances as we ourselves.  Carbon compounds pervade both plastics and the human body.  One will last forever, the other, substantially less.  Most plastic comes from oil--a fossil fuel.  One day, we shall become fossils ourselves.

Hmmm...better not to have such mortal thoughts whilst swinging sharp steel blades near my throat.